A sad day: preparing to say goodbye

Today marks 29 days left. Less than a month in Honduras and less than 3 days left in Copan. What?

It’s hard – and you can tell the group is feeling it too. We are just simply missing home. The realization of the actual length of 6 weeks has hit and it’s starting to cause frustration,  sadness, and withdrawal.  I think it’ll all be fine, actually I know it will. But for now, “when your lost and alone, and your sinking like a stone, carry onnnnnn.” Is our theme song.

Today was a relaxing day with a morning spent at the pool and an afternoon at school. I spent a portion of my morning playing school with Christal.  Oh, we also tango like my dad and I used to. She was giggling just as much as I was. Now, she comes up to me all the time and says, “Quiero bailar! Quiero bailar!” (I want to dance! I want to dance!). So we tango and she giggles and I giggle, and we dance and we simply enjoy life – the way everyone should.

Someone once said that children know how to switch back and forth between reality and imagination, something adults have forgotten how to do. I have reentered that childlike place, I have found the me I remember from 12 years ago. Just thinking about leaving her in a few days makes me want to cry, I love her so much.

Scratch that. I am crying. Bawling like a baby in fact. I keep replaying in my mind all of our playtimes and giggles, her screaming my name at my bedroom door, her knocking and then hiding, her hilarious “you don’t make sense face”, and her 4 year old self singing into a watering can like a microphone. She is such a great little person.

Last night I heard her mom talking to someone else and she said, “whenever Alisa is here, Christal is smiling and happy.”

As much as I wanna go home, I don’t.

Tonight, our group watched a spanish movie at the school called “Sin Nombre” or “Without a Name”. Not necessarily a kid friendly film, but it truly enlightened us and put an image to the book we studied before we left for Honduras, “Enrique’s Journey”. Totally check it out for a great idea of the level of poverty, tragedy, and desperation in Honduras that is almost inescapable.

It’s been a slightly sad day as I realize my longest visit is coming to an end – and the movie wasn’t a happy one either. I have mixed feelings right about now and I don’t really know where to continue.

Honduras observations
1. Connections mean more than words can express
2. Kids have a way of finding your heart and staying there

Laugh and live fearlessly,
-Alyssa Cable